Do You Really Want that Divorce?

While I’m a divorce attorney, it doesn’t please me to see divorce. My concern for my clients is to make sure they get the divorce managed fairly and they have their interests represented. In many cases, a divorce comes after a lengthy series of battles and disagreements, and both parties have agreed that a compromise can’t be reached. However, that’s not always the case, and I read an article today that prompted me to ask “do you really want that divorce?”

The Associated Press carried a story about a couple that was – get this – on their way back from the honeymoon when they decided to get a divorce. Apparently the newlywed wife was taking too long in the airport bathroom on the way home from the honeymoon, and her new husband got tired of waiting and decided to board the airplane home without her. When she got home, she filed for divorce.

Now wait just a minute, folks. In a situation like this, without knowing the full story, I have to say it sounds like they both overreacted. What man doesn’t know that a woman occasionally takes a bit of extra time in the restroom? Women like to look their best; especially with a new husband to impress; and it’s not uncommon for them to stop and fix their hair or makeup while responding to a call of nature. It’s a fact of life, and any married man (or even a man who’s been dating a woman for a long time) should be well acquainted with this fact.

On the other hand, the article doesn’t make it clear if the plane left without her, or if the new wife simply had to go join her husband on the plane. Sure, it was a rookie move on his part to leave her alone in the airport while he boarded the plane, but it’s not like he took her ticket or stranded her in a strange airport. She could easily go join him on the plane when she finished up, and then they could have spent the flight home discussing the issue and working to resolve it. Instead, it sounds like they both flew off the handle, and filing for divorce was a drastic way to vent her disapproval.

My point here is that you should stop and ask yourself if you really want that divorce. If you’ve been fighting for a long time, exhausted marriage counseling and truly believe that you can’t resolve your differences, then it might be time for a divorce.

On the other hand, if you have a single argument where one or both of you is overreacting, it’s probably a bit fast to pull the divorce trigger. Give it a little longer, and try to work through it. Every marriage has issues, and learning how to address them helps prepare you for your current relationship, and any future relationships you might have.